This will be my first post in many years (all others have been deleted).  I find myself wanting to first explain that I’m not in a great place.  The stresses of several events in the recent past, and those upcoming are starting (or continuing) to bear down on me daily.  I find myself overwhelmed and a nervous wreck most of the time.  I’ll delve into the details of what lead me here as I post more, but for today, I’m trying to push through, keep my chin up, and head above water…Just as I’m sure many of you are.  Together, or at least reading this, and myself reading your stories and replies I hope we can find some relief!

There is nothing off-topic here (though bad actors, trolls, and those with wicked intentions will be blocked of course!)

So for today, I say this, my husband is also a nervous wreck about many things, money, work, weight and for the both of us, the too recent, but now too long decision to add alcohol to our lives to cope.  This is certainly not new to many of you, and now we’ve come heavily under it’s thumb.  Promising each day to get better, stopping, and then starting again too frequently and to excess.  It helps for a short time, then we’re left with the fallout…What did we do? What did we say?  The embarrassment of it all is only making things worse!  So, for now, I leave you with this, today I won’t, and not tomorrow either is my hope, nor the day after that.

The incredible weight bearing down on me will make it hard, but I will try…and I will be honest about those things, and my attempts to do better in my next post!

Thank you for reading! Your replies are always appreciated!

~EylaRay